We hear, read and talk about forgiveness almost everyday. Yet, do we really know how it feels? I know we say we forgive others and we accept apologies from others and ourselves. But are we truly feeling it?

When I make a mistake as soon as I realize it or its brought to my attention, I immediately apologize (if I’m honestly in the wrong-I’m not a door mat and I don’t let others take advantage, yet I have a deep desire to be a kind, giving, loving person). But I have a tendency to carry the regret and even grief over my mistakes even after the other person has obviously let it go and moved on. So, by my not letting go also, am I keeping the mistake alive? Am I allowing it power it doesn’t deserve and maybe in fact never had until I refused to let go and forgive myself.

We know that by not forgiving others, the only person we’re hurting is ourselves. But what about when we don’t forgive ourselves? Are we not committing an even greater harm to ourselves? If the other person has forgiven us then the mistake can and should dissolve, die, evaporate into the ether. It no longer has a life to it unless we carry regret and grief over the mistake we made. Then we are again only hurting ourselves.

If the mistake is truly that, a mistake or just a moment of not thinking about our actions or words, a moment of weakness (which we all have, it’s human nature), or even despair when we act out of frustration and weariness, then apologize, do what is needed to correct the issue and make the situation right with the other person. Then move on in peace, calm, kindness and love. Allow yourself to feel the positive for them and yourself. Now, let it go.

Categories: Children, Cultural Diversity, education, Energy Healing, Health, Law of Attraction, Meditation, Mental and Spiritual Health, Metaphysical, New Age, Psychology, Self Help, Self Improvement, Sociology, Spiritual Energy Healing, Spirituality, Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 37 Comments

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37 thoughts on “Forgiveness

  1. Katrina – Great post! Joan Borysenko (author, PhD, scientist, doctor) said that, “There is no healing without forgiveness.”

  2. Forgiveness sets our soul free. Excellent post!

  3. Great post!!. I always say that I easily forgive others, I always tend to apologize whether I did wrong or not, but what i can’t do is forgive myself. I think you are right, that is keeping the mistake alive

  4. In my experience, people forgive others much more easily than they forgive themselves.

  5. So true, and I think we can only forgive others to the extent we can forgive ourselves. Judging others and judging ourselves go hand in hand. When we have compassion for ourselves, we can begin to feel it for others also.

  6. the forgiveness is a great conquest, the largest of our very existence. If we can understand that we are not facing anything that events occur, we would all be a little more calm.

  7. Great post! I often have to remember to forgive myself! But how do we Forgive those who have hurt us? It may take a lifetime for the aggressor to connect, address the issue, and for Peace to evolve, but in the mean time, how do we forgive them and let go of the pain so we can move forward?? That, I believe, is the hardest form of forgiveness.

  8. intuitiveone

    awesome, sometimes easier said than done. I agree whole heartedly.

  9. Making amends to myself is where I start. Once I forgive myself it’s easier to forgive others.

  10. So hard though (see my “0.1%” post. I have forgiven these people over and over and over but I can’t any more, so I am in a quandary.

    • Katrina

      I deal with the same type issues, at some point we have to say, “I forgive you, but I can’t trust you, so I have to step back and not allow you to hurt me anymore.” One of the toughest things we ever have to do!

      • Thanks, Katrina – you are so right about this being tough. I will try harder and thanks for your inspiration! Juliexx

  11. I’m usually fine with forgiveness except for when it comes to the events of my childhood. As I’ve stated in my own blog, I cannot forgive until I forget. It’s been over twenty years and I can still remember a lot of it!

    This is my life lesson and I struggle with it.

    I keep thinking of the wise words of Mr Miyagi…

    “For man with no forgiveness in heart, living worse punishment than death.”

    • Katrina

      True words, although, I understand how you feel, I live with some less than perfect memories from childhood and even some backstabbing as an adult from my family, bottom line, families are super tough!

  12. The hardest person I found to forgive is myself. I have little trouble forgiving others, but for some reason I have trouble giving myself that same gift.

  13. Great ideas. For me, it’s even hard sometimes to see that you NEED to forgive yourself. Big, blatant issues are easy to spot but a long-standing, low-grade anger or resentment toward yourself can be hard to spot and then stop. Thanks for the reminder!

  14. Warriors and Goddesses

    same Katrina I hang onto regrets and hindsights too much. When you do finally learn to let go, the freedom that arises is unbelievable. Forgiving others is hard, forgiving yourself is harder! Approaching someone with an attitude of love when they have hurt you takes super strength and again it’s a measure of how much we love ourselves. Great post (this is something I have been thinking about myself lately)

  15. Wow, amazing blog layout! How long have you been blogging for? you made blogging look easy. The overall look of your website is fantastic, let alone the content!

  16. forgiving ourselves, the really hard part

    then being at peace with ourself, not only worth it, but necessary

    happy mother’s day katrina 😉

  17. Great post and thanks for your comments. Why don’t you have a follow button?

    • Katrina

      It should be right beside the like button, not sure why it doesn’t show up for you.

  18. Very strange! No follow button next to the like button!?

  19. I am constantly searching online for posts that can help me. Thx!

  20. According to the ‘follow’ button, I am following you but I am not getting the notifications – will try again tomorrow!

    • Katrina

      I have not been posting everyday, life has been getting in the way, I hope to get back in a routine soon. Thanks for following me.

  21. I am sooo struggling with this forgiveness thing at the moment so I went back and looked at this post of yours and very helpful Katrina. Jx

    • Katrina

      You’re very welcome, I too struggle with and its usually over forgiving myself. Hang in there and have a great week.

      • Thanks, Katrina -I can forgive myself but these people (my husbands’ brother and co.) are so ghastly and greedy and malicious – sorry – too much information! Juliex

      • Katrina

        Don’t be sorry, we all need someone to ‘vent’ our frustrations to, I’ll listen anytime you need a empathetic ear. one of my girlfriends says listening is what I do best.

      • I’m a good listener too – usually – but this forgiveness thing is doing my head in – trying! Thanks so much – tomorrow will be tomorrow thank goodness!

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